Family and Systemic Constellations
Groups and
one-to-one
I wonder what has brought you to this page...
You may be familiar with constellations and want to check me out. Read on, ask questions, see what resonates.
Or perhaps this is your first encounter with constellations. You are new to this way of working, curious and wondering what it's all about.
Three things...
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People often tell me that constellations found them rather than the other way round. They found themselves at a constellation almost by chance, and suddenly it all made sense, often deeply.
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It is an approach often best experienced through participation rather than understood intellectually. You can take it at your own pace.
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Constellations found me too, and I discovered that I love this way of working. Things shift. New clarity emerges. Something settles into place. Something finds a voice.
Some people come to a constellation just once. Others attend a few times, in a group, before bringing their own issue. Others discover that constellations become a regular practice that supports them over time. I offer group constellations and one-to-one constellations.
So what actually happens in this way of working? The sections below explain this in more detail. If there is anything I can do to help you step in, let me know. No question is too small.
About Constellations
Family constellations provide an effective lens through which we can attend to our family and other personal relationships. Structural Systemic Constellations (Syst ®) extend the classic family constellation approach, incorporating new methods.
This approach offers a fresh way to explore and work with a broad range of relationship and life issues, including professional or organisational issues, illness or physical symptoms, struggling to say 'no', self image, lack of fulfillment, discontentment, to name but a few.
Constellations complement other forms of exploration and personal development, including personal reflection, conversation, therapy and coaching. What unfolds in a single session is often freeing, sometimes surprising, often moving.
The focus of constellations is the individual within the context of their wider system. Just as the solar system is made up of many interconnected bodies and forces, each of us is part of our own unique network of relationships, experiences and influences.
Through constellations, significant events that have impacted on the system and its web of relationships can be explored. Underlying, and sometimes unseen, dynamics within the individual's system can begin to reveal themselves. Then, with greater clarity, it becomes possible to work towards resolving entanglements and blockages within the system. Positive change often follows.
Every constellation is different. I invite you to read on.
What you might want to bring to a Constellation
wishing for a healthier relationship with a partner, family member or someone close to you
exploring different parts of yourself when you feel pulled in two directions
seeking greater confidence, clarity and the courage to step forward with important decisions
searching for clearer separation and disentanglement from someone important in your life
seeking greater clarity about your place or next steps at work or within an organisation
wanting to move a project, business or creative venture forward
finding peace with difficult experiences from your past and begin to let go
wanting to move beyond recurring patterns or a sense of feeling stuck
exploring patterns and experiences in your family that seem to repeat across the generations
seeking reconciliation with someone important in your life
My approach and the tradition I work within
Constellations have continued to evolve since Bert Hellinger's original work through the contributions of many practitioners and training schools. My own training is with Dr. Holm v. Egidy in Systemic Structural Constellations (SySt®) and Self-Integration Constellations.
Holm's particular approach, which resonates deeply with my wider counselling, supervision and coaching practice, places particular emphasis on three key resources: clear boundaries, own space and the Self. Supporting the healthy integration of the Self has become central to the way I facilitate Constellations.
In this context, the Self refers to all that is uniquely ours: our potential, vitality, desires and inner knowing.
At the beginning of each session, we spend a little time exploring what the Self means for you, so that we have a shared understanding before moving into the Constellation itself. Throughout the Constellation, we continue to pay attention to your relationship with your Self. It is not unusual to discover that, over time, life experiences have weakened this connection, sometimes only a little, sometimes more profoundly. Through the work of the Constellation, people often rediscover aspects of themselves that have become hidden or disconnected, allowing them to reconnect with an inner source of clarity, vitality and strength.
Group Constellations
I have been facilitating a monthly Constellations group for over three years. The group is simply called Tuesday Constellations. It brings together a core group of regular attendees alongside people joining for the first time. The group usually meets on the second Tuesday evening of each month, near Lewes, and lasts around two hours. You are welcome to attend as often or as occasionally as feels right for you. You may come just once, or you may discover that it becomes a regular practice for you. Both are equally welcome.
Each evening usually includes one person bringing an issue for constellation work. If you already have an issue in mind and would like to talk this through beforehand, you are very welcome to contact me. I generally encourage people to attend at least once before bringing their own issue, simply to experience the process first, although there are always exceptions. We usually decide together on the evening who would like to bring an issue. If more than one person wishes to do so, we will find a way to accommodate this where possible.
Alongside Tuesday Constellations, I also facilitate occasional one-off workshops, both independently and as part of larger events.
One-to-one Constellations
You and me - working one-to-one
Some people prefer the intimacy and privacy of a one-to-one Constellation. These can be equally effective as Group Constellations. The format is similar, starting with an introductory discussion to clarify the issue and what you are wanting to address. Then, instead of group participants acting as representatives in your system, we will create 'markers' for the different positions in the physical space (e.g. simple sheets of paper, with a description). I will step into those different positions and describe my perceptions from those positions, for you to gain clarity regarding your particular situation. As with Group Constellations we will work towards resolution for you to experience, emotionally and cognitively, in your body and with all your senses.
Bringing Constellations into other work
If you are already working with me in counselling, supervision or coaching, sometimes a constellation can be woven in to add another dimension, bring clarity or help with movement. We can discuss what this might look like.
More detail about what actually happens in a Constellation
One person steps forward with an issue they want to bring. They become the issue-holder. They are supported to create a physical representation of the important elements in their situation. These might include people, relationships, significant events, beliefs or themes such as illness, responsibility or success - anything of significance within their system. In a Group Constellation, other participants are invited to become representatives for the different elements. In a one-one Constellation, the facilitator steps steps in and out of being a representative for the different elements.
Being able to see and experience this representation of their system can offer the issue-holder new perspectives. As the representatives share what they experience in their different positions, further information and insights can emerge.
One of the most remarkable aspects of Constellations is the experience of the representative(s). Although they know very little — or sometimes nothing — about the people or issues they represent, they often report thoughts, feelings or physical sensations that prove surprisingly relevant. There is no accepted scientific explanation for this phenomenon, yet many people find the accuracy both striking and deeply moving.
As the Constellation unfolds, we explore what the system needs in order to move towards greater balance. This may involve acknowledging what has happened, separating from burdens that do not belong to you, or discovering healthier ways of relating to people and experiences. Each constellation finds its own path.
The experience can be freeing, with people often describing a greater sense of clarity, movement or lightness.
Sometimes a situation is not ready to move towards immediate resolution. Even then, seeing and experiencing the stuckness in this way can itself create movement.
Some final thoughts about participating in a Group Constellation as a representative and/or observer
Constellations need issue-holders and they need representatives. Participating in this way is not only an opportunity for serving others. Each time there is also an opportunity for personal learning, for insight and an experience of shared humanity. Participants often comment how universal themes explored can be, with personal relevance also to participants, and on how rewarding the experience is.
The same goes for observers. Depending on the size of the group some participants will be observers in the holding and witnessing circle. Just as important and equally rewarding.
Contact
Contact
Photographs on this page show a Family Constellations board with wooden figurines. I sometimes use this board in one-to-one Constellations sessions.